13 May 2018

Teacher training journal: entry #1

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Ego drives me to injury.

Now that I am doing much more yoga than ever before, I am finding more errors in my technique via painful body parts. This means re-leaning poses, like Adho Mukha Śvānāsana (Down Dog) and in my transition from Phalakasana (High Plank) Chaturanga Dandasana (Low Plank).

This means dropping my knees down during the transition from High to Low Plank; a move I scorned because I could do the transition. . . . now my left shoulder is telling me that I was doing in incorrectly, and will need to drop my knees for a long time now; first to heal, and then to relearn. Yesterday, my shoulder smiled at me for dropping to my knees and I felt proud of myself.

But then, ego drove me to do as many repetitions of the all Tibetan Rites because I felt that I could. I forgot that this pattern is new moves. My left shoulder is now yelling at me to remember that I can do a new move or pattern once in a practice, paying attention to best alignment, taking my time and giving my body a chance to learn.

tibetan rites

I promise to remember this. I commit to doing this every day. Ego lives in the brain, and doesn’t connect with the heart. My heart wants all of me to be healthy, and my spirit to be congruent with my body.

The learning given to me by my parents and by society, i.e. ignoring the body and driving it forward with caffeine/exercise/work, does not serve me.

Best practice means being mindful, paying attention, and taking time. Just because I can do it, doesn’t mean I should. I have to check in with all of me before I do.

Dear left shoulder, I apologize. I hope that you will forgive me. I love you.

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